Monday, September 14, 2015

A Tale of Burps and Farts

I know I write so much about Megan, but I want to emphasize that it doesn’t mean she’s my favorite or anything. They’re ALL my favorites! ;)

But the thing is, when Ryan and Timmy were younger, we spent a lot more time together because we were home schooling, and by then Megan and Caitlin were done with home schooling. So there was more to write about the boys.

Nowadays, Caitlin is 24, an EMT working twelve hour shifts along with volunteering with a rescue squad, and has a very busy social life. The little time we have together in any given week is usually spent chattering in the kitchen while I’m cooking and cleaning and she’s getting ready for work.

Ryan is fifteen….need I say more? ;) Really, though, Ryan is a much more low key kind of guy, quite the introvert like Caity.

And Timmy has a pretty active social life himself, as well as being in public school now  like Ryan is.

So it falls to Megan, who is home with me and spends the most time with me, to provide me with fodder to share with everyone. And does she ever live up to that awesome responsibility! She’s just so funny and fun, I can’t help but want to let y’all in on it. ;)

Last night, Caitlin stopped at Walmart to pick up a few things for us before she had to go in for her shift, so Megan and I were preparing Caity’s food for work. We were already making Tuna Pasta Salad for supper anyway so Megan got to work on the sandwich for her.

As I sliced some super sharp cheddar cheese for Caity’s snack, Megan wanted some but I said no. Then I spied a paper thin sliver on the knife I had used, so I offered it to Megan before resuming my Tuna Pasta Salad prep work. Megan kept trying to get me to throw it into her mouth but I wouldn’t, and made her take it with her hand.

So we started sticking our tongues out at each other, which morphed into curling our tongues and then trying to make them go sideways. Megan can actually do that, but I always give up and make my *head* go sideways, which in turn “technically” makes my tongue sideways. Go me! ;)

And of course all this had us both busting up laughing together.

Suddenly I burped an unexpected, very forceful burp. Believe me, I’m just as surprised as you are that something so crass erupted from delicate, refined, little ol’ me.

“Dalerie Heaver Jeanne!” Megan scolded, mocking shame at my odorous outburst. Jeanne is my middle name, and Heather is hers, and I have no clue why she puts them together, but it’s funny when she does it in that indignant manner of hers.

Her next move was to try to fart a retort, which was unsuccessful. Thankfully, for my sake. ;)

So instead she made a huge loud “fart” on her bare arm, which she is *very* proficient at. Many a time she has regaled us with her arm farts and grown in this valuable skill.

Which of course sent me and Megan into a fit of giggles.

And of course I had to write about it, which you know I’ve done several times already, similar pieces.

But lest you think our home is always filled with childish humor such as burps and farts, believe me when I tell you that that specific type of jocularity comprises a mere 10% of our entire panoply of banter and joking.

I mean, seriously, could someone who practices too much infantine whimsy come up with such a capable, sophisticated sentence as the above?

I think not. ;)

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